Crane Queen

One of my favorite things that I'm proud of is, of course, my 4.0, which I work very hard to keep each year. If I wasn't happy that I got it or satisfied, there would definitely be something wrong with me. But one thing I'm proud of that most people don't know about me is my excellence in playing the crane machines. I'm sure you've seen one in an arcade. They are tall, brightly lit, four-sided glass wall machines that usually contain stuffed animals or various jewelry. The object is to manuever the crane oer the desired object (using buttons, joystick, whatever) and release it so it will pick up the prize, carry it back to the hole and drop it into the prize bin, so you can pick it up. I love thise things a lot and I have made a sort of science on how to play them. And I'm good. I have the prize to prove it. Everything from cards in boxes to candy to necklaces to bears and many more. In fact, over 1/3 of my 300 stuffed animals are from crane machines. Maybe some day I'll write a book about them.

Lily & Alex - A short play that doesn't seem to end...

Characters: 2 M, 1 F
- Alexander (18)
- Lily (16)
- Terry (10)

(Stage is bare except for a bed in the middle, Alexander is sitting on the edge body bent over as in deep thought. He raises up as lights come up, but can't find strength to get up.)

ALEX: Time passed slowly. As it did, I began to open up and explore more of my new environment and myself. Mentally, I was still shaken up, unstable, like a piece of lighted dynamite. One minute I'd be perfectly fine, but then-- (stops as if reliving it)

... Then the nightmares return to haunt me, and the load of guilt they brought with them. My guilt. One was so dark, and my skin felt clammy and was frozen ice as groups of people encircled me. They were the ones I tortured and... some killed, by my orders. Hands that were starving reached out as if to devour me and others even more indescribable would scream and point at me... and it was my fault. And abruptly it would end.

At times like those I would reach for the old leather Bible that Lily had given me. (Reaches for it and shows it.) Oh the comfort this has given me. It is especially important that it was Greg's Bible. (pause) He who I had once known as my enemy and had succeeded in destroying. (Shames at this.) But now... now his notes and highlighted passages heal my wounds. (Flips through and looks at pages intently.)

Infact, my whole stay at Lily's house has been nothing short of healing and pleasure. All of her family has taken me in, and each moment I spent with them I wish could last for days. Sweetest of all is her mother, Annie, who is an exceptional cook, bringing me many curious meals that taste as delicious as they look. Her words of encouragement and sense of humor make life more (may pantomime and gesture) bearable.

Then there's Terry, her little brother, who is obsessed with card tricks and seems to find a new one to show me every day. I must admit he's not too good, but I enjoy the company and the entertainment. He's just so full of energy you can feel it and it makes you feel light-hearted too. Lily's father, Steward, has made an impact on me even though I don't see him as often as everyone else. He's a workaholic, a true perfectionalist and sometime can get stressed out, especially with his job as an accountant and bills to pay. When he does though, he takes time out to just be alone and sometimes will focus on me and ask how my day has been.

Well most of them are spent in here (gestures) in the guest room. I've been in here for a few weeks - I'm not too aware of the time. (Gets up.) Some days the attacks are so bad I find it impossible to leave the room. Every day is another step from the wreck I was (thinks on this) to the new... (as if searching for the right word) me.

My best parts of the day are spent with Lily. I feel closer to her than to anyone ever before. Before I knew her, she was also my enemy. But ever since the day I found out the truth... about myself and my world... she has really stuck up for me... Although Melanie was the one who, over a short period of months, brought me to this truth; it has been Lily who had taken on the role of my... (searching for the word again)... (smiles) friend.

Everything about her just leaps out at me... likes sparks from a glowing bonfire. Her hair is a vibrant chestnut brown, that falls into small curls just above her shoulder. Her eyes are a pastel blue, like a robin's egg and they're so full of hope. They shine out and show the whole world the inner most corners of her heart. It's as if she's always smiling...

We'd sit and talk for what seemed like hours on anything that came up. That's the way she is... spontaneous. Her slap-stick sense of humor reminds me of her mother's, but she's keenly aware of other people's feeling and can always seem to pinpoint a problem you're having. (LILY enters. Lights dim and rise.)

One day I was particularly bored, and as soon as she came in it seemed that she had thoroughly studied me and diagnosed me as such.

LILY: Hey Alex!

(He sighs and looks at floor. She looks carefully and then hurries to imaginary window at left of bed. He senses she has gone there and looks at her in confusion.)

ALEX: (concerned) What's wrong? (Joins her at window.)

LILY: (giggles) Take a look at Mrs. Ashton's poodle. (points out window)

ALEX: Where I don't -- What! Whoa! Ha! (begins to laugh uncontrollably) ... (calms) That is the strangest thing... (chuckle) I've ever seen!

LILY: That tutu is so becoming! (laughs at this) Oh look! Isn't that Liz over there at the park!

ALEX: Yeah, she's with someone... talking to a man in a suit...

LILY: Want to play a game?

ALEX: What!

LILY: (smiles) Let's make up a story about the person she's with!

ALEX: Huh?

LILY: Here. Let's say he's from San Diego, has... a wife and two kids. Now give him an occupation.

ALEX: Oh. How about lawyer since he is wearing a suit.

LILY: Great! (Lights dim slowly) Now let's figure out... (Lily exits)

ALEX: We'd go on and on and make it into a story! Lily did something special for me that day. She taught me how to be... creative.

From then on we'd always "people watch" as she calls it, and I haven't looked at people the same way since. I now know that every person has an untold story to tell. (with intensity) She's just so interesting and so... real. I feel like I can... (crosses to center) that I'm just so full of... (searches for word, but suddenly backs off as if embarrassed)

Sorry, guess I got carried away. It's just that in the past few weeks everything has changed so suddenly. I've gone from being one person to the beginning of another. It seems so long ago, yet I remember it. Lily tells me that for a person to change it can take days to years or anywhere inbetween; effort was what mattered.

I only hope my old ways are buried in the rubble of that cas-- (pauses)... place. And for good. I still feel like my father is watching me. Grading me and blaming me for all the times I had failed to follow in his darkened footsteps. He occupies many of the nightmares, but now... that I know he is gone... dead, I know he can't rule over me or torture any more lives. I'll still have to live with the fact that I did try to duplicate his evil, and many would say in ways I surpassed... ways, and a life, that I don't wish to expand on... at least not now... while the wounds are fresh...

(Lily Enters)

LILY: Hey Alex! Dad wants to know if you want to go fishing with him and Joe this weekend up at "Lake de Fandango." (does a dance)

(Alex laughs at this and joins her in her little "dance". Suddenly TERRY busts in through the door.)

TERRY: (excited) Alex, it came!

ALEX: (Startled by him) What?

TERRY: The video game I ordered remember? You gotta see them! They are so awesome! One's about these knights and...

LILY: How about you go try them out?

TERRY: (looks at them) All right... (sneaks over to Alex. Speaks in a whisper) But you'll play me later, huh?

ALEX: Sure.

TERRY: Yes! (exits quickly)

LILY: So can I tell him yes?

ALEX: I don't know...

LILY: Come on. You need to have a "guy-bonding" thing. How bout I tell him you'll go if you're up to it.

ALEX: Oh... okay. But that's not a yes for sure! (She runs out also.)

(Suddenly Lily pops her head back in.)

LILY: I almost forgot.

ALEX: What?

LILY: Kyle called. He wanted to apologize for accusing you. He wants you to call him back... ASAP... okay?

ALEX: After dinner.

(She nods and exits again. He walks back towards bed.)

ALEX: Kyle. The one person who still hasn't forgiven me. Not that I ever expected he would. After what I did... who could? Sometimes I feel that I have to compete with him for anything, even friendship. Last week he said I was forgiven, but he seemed to still be cautious with me. I feel like there's an impenetrible wall separating us. Last week I thought it was over. Last week on this day I was at the peak of feeling free of my former self, but last week I found Kyle spying on me...

Sometimes I wonder if a person can go back to the way... they were. If I were to... I can't help worrying about it. Lily assures me that I can't; that I may not be perfect, but I'll never walk that road again.

The way Kyle looks at me though... What if I did? What would they do? I told Lily if I ever did just to destroy me. She got upset and said I was talking nonsense and not to worry about Kyle because he's suspicious of everyone. I guess someone has to be... (sits down carefully)

In these weeks, I have learned two things: One, that healing is a slow process, like... microwave popcorn, it happens a little bit at a time, but then sets off a chain reaction, til only afew kernel scars are left. (rubs forearm gently) I also learned that friendship is vital to anyone's existence... I don't know how I lived my first 17 years without it...

I just hope that I will gain Kyle's frienship... and (looks at Bible again) that I won't be the killer of those who sought most to help me... (He bends down again as lights fade, once again in deep thought over something.)

(Fade to Black)

END.

It's Monday and...

It's Monday and I'm already overworked and overstressed. Not only do I have 2 projects due by Wednesday, an audition for the Musical tomorrow, and homework galore, I also have a constantly running nose. Don't get me wrong, I think it's good that I have lots to do; but sometimes I wish I could go home, play Pokémon, catch some 'toons on the tube and pick up a good book without having to worry about this or that. There are times I tell myself, "Just get through this week, and then it'll be great!" Then however, another week comes, and, just as promised, the problems go away. Soon they are replaced by deadlines; important meetings, and more projects. I guess it's like a vicious cycle and me thrown in and out of it all. It's a good thing I have God on my side, or I'd be toast. Which, being a Christian can get me into trouble too, but somehow he gets me out of it. It's Monday and life's journey is a long road with Jesus in the pickup and me riding shotgun beside him, together with all the problems that may come driving by.

Is it a Fairytale?

I read an entry in The 21st Century magazine called "Storybook Love" by Lori Kessler. It was about how she felt about "fairy-tales" type love, and her own experience with a guy she met skiing in 7th Grade, Anthony. When they met, they instantly became friends and found they had much in common. The only problem was Lori had to leave 2 days later, and Anthony lived 8 hours away. Her parents tried to discourage her from her "puppy love" with him, but they wrote letters and continue to see each other to this day. In fact, he has invited her to join him at his Prom and graduation. For one, I think it's good to stay friends with someone, but she has to be careful not to fall into the trap of early love. I hope they continue to stay friends, and maybe someday they will get married. But I think for now they should concentrate on school and not do something they will later regret. It takes a minute to make a friend, but a lifetime to make a marriage.

Treasure Chest

Under my bed lies a little box that I won at a white elephant party at New Year's two years ago. When I got it, I couldn't figure out what to do with it. Then one day I was going through my Goodie Box & Scrapbooks and I found some stuff. I found: my tiny Pokey the Puppy book that I got from a Hardee's, some little toys from McDonald's, my girl scout pin, and a ticket from Disney World. I decided to put these in my new treasure box. Soon I added other things, feathers from the birds at the EAF (at the zoo where I work), a label from my favorite pasta that had a scratch and win game on the inside, an old bunny address book. All of these things which are meaningless to most people are treasures to me. They remind me of times past and present, times of hard work and sorrow, and even some of the happiest in my life. And even now I still add to the man wonders inside (many not mentioned). On of the latest is a lock of hair from my horse Chula that I had at my Senior High Horse Camp last summer. I love the things in there, and love to open my box and sift through my memories. Even the outside is decorated with special stickers, from events like my best friend's birthday, Drama club elections and many others. I hope it stays intact, and maybe someday I can show it to my children.

W.A.S.H. the World

If I was able to change one thing, out of everything that I think needs some change, it would be that there would be a real superhero international organization. We could call it the W.A.S.H. (or the World Association of Super Heroes) There could be about 100 or so members who are each responsible for a part of the world. The only bad thing would be that the Super Villains would probably get together too, which could cause problems, but overall it would be a benefit to society. Anyone with the right super hero inward qualities could join and be apprenticed by a hero for 5 years and then they could join as true members. Being first assigned a city and being promoted gradually. I think our world could use some super heroes, if only in our imaginations.

Through the Eyes of... Someone Else!

Joanie!? Whoa. It's like, where do I start? She's alot like me... I mean we both like Anime like Sailor Moon & Pokémon. Sometimes she can get a bit weird. Okay, so she goes nuts alot. It's weird because she's very sensitive of other people's opinions, and lots of times she tells me that if she talks too much that I can tell her to shut up! Weird. But she's really nice too. Whenever I call her she'll talk to me, even if we're both bored out of our minds, and she'll say something like, "Whoops! Charlene the Nuclear Plant across the street exploded. Oh well..." Where does she get this stuff? Guess I'll have to ask her sometime.

Joanie is a surprise-a-minute. Sometimes she's bouncing off the wall doing one of her "voices" or making a racket. The rest of the time she is pessimistic and beats up on herself. She always says, "But what if I can't..." or "It's too hard." All I ever hear is that she can't. She is so sensitive that even a little comment about her will make her go into this deep depression. I don't think I'll ever understand my daughter. One of her best qualities is doing her best in whatever she does. The only downside to that is that if it's not perfect, she does the sigh, bang-head-on-wall routine. She really is sweet and I wouldn't have her any other way.